Labeling

Has anyone commented that you are a hoarder? How did that feel to you? What about any other label someone used to describe you? The way we react can be due to any number of factors, yet like so many things – it’s not a simple black or white question. Were you even thinking about how we label people when you saw the title “Labeling” or were you thinking about labeling things?

Yet, have you found yourself struggling to find a concise description of a category or a file? I see this most often with people when it comes to their files- ‘what should I call it?’ There are so many words in the English language that we can choose from – the file we have on our car could be labeled – Car; Auto; VW; Bug/Beetle; Old Beater; His/Her Car; and on and on.

If labeling something that stays the same can present a challenge, it’s fascinating that trying to label people is so common. To state the obvious, people are more complex than a collection of papers! This is where it’s worth considering how labeling both helps and hinders you.

I continue to be dismayed overall by the overuse of labeling people as a “hoarder” – it’s so popular that it’s easy to use it to describe anyone that has “too much stuff.” And “too much stuff” is a subjective – depending on who uses the hoarder label for other people could be someone that has overfull bookshelves in every room. When it’s applied in the subjective way, someone with stuff that is viewed as too much by someone else – there’s no recognition of the objective criteria that defines hoarding.

Educating people can be part of what I do – and I will share the standards for what defines hoarding. When someone has been categorized as a “hoarder” by family, whether it’s done seriously or by repeatedly “joking” around, identifying with that can hinder the organizing efforts. It can be important to know that simply because someone else has defined them as a hoarder doesn’t make it accurate. The same thing applies when someone is applying that term to themselves – and this is also growing in frequency – it’s not limited to other people defining them. And it’s just as inaccurate – technically.

The way people react to the label being applied to them – whether it’s self-applied or comes from others – can vary too. As I’ve said, I find the term overall to carry negative connotations, and many people feel similarly. Yet, other people (not oblivious to some of the term’s negativity) appreciate that the term gives them a frame of reference – a place to begin understanding what they have been struggling with.

I’ve even been known to refer some of my own behaviors as “hoarding tendencies” and can relate to aspects of the hoarding criteria. So is there value to identifying parts of a label that resonates with you? I think so, as it can then offer you some perspective.

Whether you’ve been objectively labeled with some term or not, you can still use the education and knowledge to support you in creating the life you want. For example, in Buried in Treasuresby David Tolin et al, they talk about how creative people are and how the ideas of how they can use things can get in their way of getting rid of having so much. I resonated with that – I have all these creative ideas and now as I look at my own collection of hobbies and crafts, I ask myself to try to be realistic and what are the pieces that really matter.

A label may or may not apply to us objectively, yet there’s no stopping any of us from using the tools for our own benefit. So, if there is a label that has been applied to you – externally or internally – see if the tools and approaches for handling that label can support you and pay no more attention to the specific label than will help you.

The Slippery Slope and You

From what I can tell, the idea of the slippery slope is well known in some arenas and unfamiliar in others. I roughly remember when one of my library science classes presented the idea of a slippery slope and it stuck with me – as they talked about school libraries removing books – like Mark Twain. Removing one book could become a slippery slope for people to then challenge any number of other books included in the school library collection. And not only the possible challenges, also the predicament of how to decide and where to draw the line – how easily you can find yourself sliding down the slope after a few missteps.

This idea – as I learned about it – was about being aware of the small things, and if you ignored the accumulation of small changes you could find yourself down that slippery slope. Imagine yourself on a literal slippery slope – the effort required to go up compared to down. It becomes simplest to let yourself slide to the bottom, although it’s certainly not the only outcome – and if you pay attention to things, you can avoid getting too far down the slope.

The slippery slope is also – apparently – known as logical fallacy where essentially the idea suggests that one step will lead to a cascading of bad decisions and undesired results – the domino effect. Some people suggested it was not a logical fallacy when a middle ground was recognized – does that one misstep would land you at the bottom of the hill or that there were many missteps before you might find yourself muddy at the base.

Yet, what does this have to do with organizing or systems and habits?

The slippery slope can also be a part of systems breaking down and if we ignore or avoid dealing with that we can find ourselves staring back up at the place we used to be. And if I haven’t said if recently, systems do break down, and what once was a great approach has become a problem. If you suspect your once working system is becoming less functional -the first step is to evaluate what parts are still working well and looking for which aspects have become problematic. This gives you some time to see if the issues persist before you take any action. Meanwhile, your awareness and evaluation will prevent you from any more movement in that slippery slope.

When we close our eyes to a growing stack of mail, newspapers, and magazines – it can overtake our surfaces surprisingly quickly. So, when we’re facing challenges, maintaining our systems and organization can take a backseat. Sometimes this leads to suddenly finding yourself surrounded by accumulated stuff – at the bottom of the slippery slope and out of practice.

The slippery slope can sneak up us – for perfectly good reasons just as much as once we’ve taken a series of missteps, it can become easier to make excuses or justify our future missteps. If you look at the recent past of this blog, you will see inconsistencies – which is in strong contrast to over 4 years of regularity. There was no intention of it becoming a pattern, yet as I struggled to finish a blog (there’s more partly written pieces than I’ve ever had at a given moment), it was easier to justify another missed date.

Whatever it is that starts us on the path down that slippery slope, all too often we can find ourselves already there before we recognize our missteps. Then, if things are such that correcting our habits isn’t a high enough priority we fall even more out of practice – potentially adding to the challenge of reestablishing positive and supportive habits.

When you find yourself muddy, bruised, and embarrassed at the bottom of the slippery slope you encountered it might help to know a couple of things:

The slippery slope can sneak up on any of us, and likely we all will end up at the bottom more than once in our lifetime.
It didn’t really ‘sneak’ up; we took any number of missteps to land at the bottom.
Getting yourself back to the top – not even attempting to climb up the slope you slid down – yet still finding your way back to helpful habits will take time and effort.
The journey and the path back to the top might end up being a completely new experience. We’re shifting and changing all the time so the approach you need to take might be dramatically different than how you handled things before. You have learned things since your last arrival to the top.

This idea of a slippery slope offers an image of what’s happened that also reinforces that reclaiming helpful habits isn’t going to be automatic, we get to find our way back to the top. You probably cannot predict how long it will take or what you will find on your journey – there’s a chance it might even seem completely foreign to you. Yet, you have something to conceptualize the process and hopefully that can help you avoid self-recriminations ~ which won’t be of any benefit as you set out on your journey back to the top! Thinking about the slippery slope can also help you to be aware it exists, and then you can try to avoid too many missteps; if we can recognize our entering ”dangerous” ground, we can then take action to prevent any additional slipping.

So, what do think about this slippery slope idea? Does it seem like a logical fallacy? I have a fascination on logical fallacies, so it’s probable there will be a post on it one of these days!

Bursts of Organizing

Plenty of people approach organizing projects with the mindset that setting aside a big chunk of time is the way to go. This can be the stereotypical idea of not starting to clean out the garage or basement until you have a weekend to dedicate to working on it. Maybe it’s even a reason to procrastinate, “Oh, I don’t have enough time to work on this – look at my weekends, they each have things that are more important.”

It can also be the internal “shoulds” of having the time to spend on organizing projects – “I should be spending at least 6 hours a day organizing my stuff, I don’t have that much else to do…”

First, one of the ways we all end up with too much stuff is that we haven’t embraced the process of purging as part of our life. When purging happens only when you’ve found an available weekend to clean out the garage (or wherever) – the stuff will pile up again. Is this how you want things to function going forward? I’d encourage you to incorporate the purging and hence the organizing process into your life in order to avoid a weekend of cleaning out any space.

Organizing is never truly finished; rather it’s part of life. Even when you’re attentive to getting things out, stuff can accumulate. Have I shared how my husband and I found 3 sets of mixing bowls in our cupboards a couple years ago? 3 sets! Somehow things slip through, or multiply behind our backs – and I had no idea there were 3 sets using up our valuable cupboard space (even a couple years later I’m confounded by it!).

Second, when you’re tackling a space over a weekend, you could be heading yourself into a state of overwhelm. Getting overwhelmed has potential consequences – serious ones even! In your goal of cleaning out the garage, you might reach the state of being overwhelmed as everything is strewn about for sorting – and when walking away is not a feasible option. When it might be possible to walk away, the stuff is there, now less contained and probably gnawing at you to get back to it.

You might get through everything and then find yourself resistant to any other projects that involve sorting and purging – it becomes overwhelming to consider another big project. What people often discount about any organizing – whatever the size – is how much energy it can take. If you’re working alone, physical energy is probably required. Yet, I’m talking about mental energy – the decisions required for every item. Often each item is more than 1 decision – since once you’ve decided to keep it – the first decision, where are you going to keep it? What other items do you have like it? How will you know where and how to find it when you need it? And any number of other decisions for each and every item. This can be extremely draining – and please don’t discount how much or how normal!

No matter what the size of the project – whether you want to get the whole house organized or just that linen closet – it can be done in small steps. The basement can be approached in small chunks of time rather than waiting for a whole weekend. When you break things down – whatever the size – you want to make sure you keep the things you’ve sorted distinct from the things you have yet to sort. It can also help to keep things tidy – it’s common for things to get more chaotic before they get better – so containing the stuff in order to keep things and spaces accessible as well as avoid being overwhelmed just by entering.

If it’s not obvious, I don’t recommend the weekend room tackle! There are more reasons I find it counterproductive, though I’ve certainly met and worked with people who take this approach. As long as it works for them, that’s what matters; though I expect they are still in the minority. Regardless, when you’re working in a space, sorting, organizing, and purging it needs your attention. So, in the other extreme, I would be cautious about starting an organizing project when you might have to run out of the house in 5 minutes – unless you have a plan! Bursts of organizing can be any amount of time – theoretically – you get to decide for yourself. What amount of time works well for you?

Consciously Incompetent?

I don’t remember when or where I first heard about the learning model where being consciously incompetent is one of the four stages. In some ways it surprises me how many people have not heard of the four stages of competence and then after they’ve learned about it – how excited they are by the ideas in it. Even a refresher on the ideas can be revitalizing – the model is a reminder that learning is a process. Some of us can fall into making critical judgments about ourselves and that is dismissive of how our mistakes are critical to the process – it’s a way to learn and become unconsciously competent – where we have mastered the skill and knowledge we wanted.

The first stage is unconscious incompetence. When you don’t know what you don’t know you’re in this stage. It could be that you recognize a skill in someone else, yet are dismissive of the usefulness of it. In order to move onto the next stage, you must recognize – become conscious – of both your own lack of skill and the value of learning it.

From there, you move into conscious incompetence, the second stage. You’re aware of the deficits and have little knowledge or skill yet. This is a time when you’re likely to make lots of mistakes – and making those mistakes can be important to moving through this stage. Mistakes are an opportunity to learn – as trite as that might sound! Another way to consider this is how part of what you’re doing in this stage is practicing. We’ve all heard how “practice makes perfect” (though please don’t actually try to be perfect). What we’re working on in this stage is becoming competent.

The third stage is conscious competence. You have gained the knowledge and skill though you have to think about it and probably need to concentrate in order to execute it. You might need to have all the steps broken down or have more detailed processes at this point in your learning. You are still making mistakes in this stage, though they are on the decline. The effort to demonstrate the skills can be time and energy consuming – more than what’ll be needed in the last stage.

Unconscious competence is the last of the learning stages. This is where you have mastered the skill to the point that you no longer need to concentrate to make sure it’s done correctly. Mistakes are few and far between. When you’re at this stage, you have the skills and knowledge to teach others.

As you can see, learning something new takes time as you move through these stages – and only when you’ve reached the final stage are mistakes negligible. How realistic is it to think that you can gain the skills without a learning curve? Heck, how perfect are you trying to be? The time it takes each of us to move from unconscious incompetence to unconscious competence is unique to us.

Once you know about these stages you can consider where you are in the process. Despite the fact that many people seem to believe that organizing should be simple and easy – doesn’t make it so for everyone. Let me clear, organizing is a skill like anything else – it is something anyone can learn. It’s also not knowledge we’re automatically born with – we learn it just like driving a car or anything else. Organizing is something that can have many variables – many opinions about the way to do it (or the best way). This means you have that much more to learn – more time in the middle stages before you reach the unconscious competence stage.

Therefore consider whatever it is you’re trying to develop the skills and knowledge about – what is the complexity level? Where are you in the stages of learning? To some extent, our lives are a constant state of learning – at least it can be. Therefore, if we consider the stages of learning in combination with how we can continue to learn – we have a way to gain perspective. Each and every one of us goes through all four stages – no one is exempt.

The Four Stages of Learning

Unconscious Incompetence
Conscious Incompetence
Conscious Competence
Unconscious Competence

Setting goals for yourself and trying to create new habits could be considered you learning through these same stages – how to move from resistance, to planning, to action and practice, and each step that will take you to the final goal of it becoming a routine that requires little thought. What do you think – do you see a connection between the stages of learning and your desire to make changes in your life?

Time to Make Progress?

Working on your organization and systems means you are making changes – or at least trying to. Meanwhile it’s likely the rest of your life didn’t come to halt simply because you’re determined to make progress. (Even if it did, you might not be exempt from challenges! :o) Each day we deal with any number of things and they affect us – physically, emotionally, and psychologically. And how we’re each affected has countless variations and is further influenced by any number of factors, both those we’re aware of and ones we’re blind to. This is life. When you’re motivated to focus on organizing and your systems, it’s important to consider how the timing corresponds with other factors in your life.

When you are dealing with physical, mental, emotional challenges, making changes in your life can be that much harder. It might even be that you need to wait to attempt changes until these things are under control – or potentially stable. At the very least, limit your efforts to working on small changes and set aside bigger changes for the future.

Even when there are no outside complicating factors, besides normal life, it can be easier to begin with smaller steps. Whether this is the time for you to focus on making progress or it’s better to wait, you can continue to be curious – observing that this endeavor or that family obligation is so time and energy consuming which can help show you how much you can handle at a given moment – after all, we all have our limits.

The time and energy we have to focus on making changes also has a dramatic impact on our progress. Are we realistic about the time and energy it will take for these changes to occur? Again, consider whether it is practical for you to focus on these things or would it serve you better to postpone it for a while.

Where does this specific change fall among the priorities of your life? It can feel like it “should” be the highest, or needs to be. Yet, even if it needs to be high on your list, that doesn’t automatically transform it into the thing you focus on most. (If you say it needs to be high, consider what are the factors that define it as a need as compared to a want.)

Maybe you just really want it to be a high priority. Therefore, what is getting in the way of raising it up? Sometimes it might be as “simple” as setting boundaries with other people – learning to say, no, to both the outside obligations as well as to distractions.

Other times it might not be the time for it to be as high as you want. This means that you make it a priority for it to be raised as other things move out of the way – and maybe organically it becomes a higher priority in your life. Someone in the midst of health issues might not focus on making changes, yet once that is managed, working on getting the kitchen organized moves up the list – becoming a more reasonable change.

It can be extremely frustrating when your motivation for focusing on this one thing doesn’t align well with other parts of your life. And you can decide to focus on them anyway. I only want to urge you to simply consider these factors before adding more to your shoulders:

Physical, mental, or emotional challenges – your own or someone dear to you
Your time and energy
The realistic priority in this moment, for you

Only you can decide whether the timing is suitable for you to focus on organization and your systems. The idea of “do it now” might be appropriate; yet it’s just as possible that doing it now would be counter-productive. Deciding to wait – recognizing that it’s unrealistic in this moment to spend your energy this way – can be a demonstration of wisdom. So, how is the timing aligning with the other factors of your life?

Beauty and Function

Considering our vision of what we want our space to feel like and express, how critical is beauty in your environment? All of us have things that we find beautiful. This is part of what we want to surround ourselves with and these things often inspire us. Or at least we hope they will. It might even be a criterion that is high on your list of importance – wanting your space to be beautiful – although it’s not important for everyone. The work you do in your home – organizing, cleaning, purging, decorating, repairs, etc. – are at least somewhat about making your space also your home. It can be important to decide when aesthetics are the highest priority for your time and energy.

As I’ve talked about before, beauty – in the eye of the beholder – can be one of the criteria for whether to keep things in your space or if it’s time to let something move on to be appreciated by someone else. One of the other primary criteria is whether something is useful. If something serves a function in your life – that is important.

“Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful.” William Morris

Recently, I’ve found that professional organizers frequently use this quote as a guiding principle and I talk more about this in Useful & Beautiful.

Notice which comes first – useful and then beauty – this is about priorities. Those parts and pieces of things in our life that keep us moving forward are most important. If we try to dismiss how useful something is, often we end up with more complications. Similarly, making things attractive does not translate into things being useful. It’s potentially a sad truth that creating a space and system that function well for you might be “unattractive” – according to your criteria.

Yet, what is most important? Is having a space that is perfectly beautiful yet is more effort to use effectively something you’d choose? If you’d choose beauty over function, I’d be curious to know what that desire is about for you. Consider times past when the living room might only be used when guests are visiting – that space requires little more function and can easily be beautified. When we’re actively using a space, the function of it might mean that it’s less beautiful – at least in the traditional sense.

How do you value the effort needed to use your things? Consider the differences between things that have been simplified and streamlined for function compared to things where it’s harder to use, requiring more effort and time. It can be tempting to focus on the aesthetics and decide you’ll just make it work – somehow. We try to convince ourselves that if it’s just beautiful, we’ll be motivated to expend the extra effort and time to work around less functionality.

A caveat – this talk about beauty in a space will depend on how you define beauty. Each of us can have a different opinion about what things detract from beauty in a space. Just as your vision of beauty might not match other people – a challenge when your partner has their vision and it’s quite different. If they’re unconcerned with the aesthetics of the space, then the way beauty is defined – by either of you – won’t be an issue.

I’d encourage you to make it functional first (often this process takes time) – create a way that it supports you so things are simplified – and once you understand what aspects you need, you can look for ways to beautify it. Personally (which is to say that I don’t put this on my clients), I think about the beautifying process at the end – as the icing on the cake – the fun and final steps in creating systems, a sign of succeeding in the bigger goal of making things functional.

By postponing the beautifying of your space – you can learn your tendencies and make accommodations for them that directly connect with beautifying. It’s likely that wherever you spend most of your time in your home has “not beautiful” evidence of you. Yet, you’re living in this space and functioning, so it’s not surprising. Once you’ve ruled out some other reasons things collect in places – like it not having a home, requires too much time and effort to get it back to its home, etc. – it might be that you simply need to have a space for these things. Creating a space for these things hanging around could mean a decorative (and functional, of course) container or piece of furniture – at least when your priority is on aesthetics.

Being more concerned about beauty over function can be another part of why we lose things. When someone is most concerned about getting things looking pretty, the decisions about where to put everything else can be rushed. Even when you take your time making decisions about where to put things away, your options for storing things are based on beauty – getting it out of sight.

Remember, when you make function the highest priority, you can then probably find ways to beautify it. It can be surprisingly easy to focus on things that are “easy” – rather than on what is most important – whether that’s this function and beauty idea or something else. Beauty can feel easier, whereas trying to figure out function for yourself and space can feel daunting. Consider finding one small area that you know needs an improvement in function – focus on just that for now. As I say over and over – experiment, set up something new and try it for a while and see what happens. There can also be beauty in the experimenting with function. 😉

Goals, SMART Criteria, and You

I’ve talked before about goals – whether that’s the traditional New Year’s Resolution(s) or more generally setting goals for our life. We all know that what makes this most likely to succeed – setting SMART goals – and yet we don’t always follow this mnemonic when the New Year is here and we choose what we want to be different this year. And aren’t there always things we want to be different this year – the resolution of a past struggle or success at some new endeavor? Then what’s stopping us from using the SMART mnemonic as we set our sights on how things can be different, even better?

Quickly, here are the SMART criteria:

Specific – be specific about what you want to change/improve, answer (usually) each of the 5 W’s (what, why, where, who, and which)
Measurable – what are you going to measure and how to know you’ve accomplished your goal (i.e. weight lost or time walking a mile etc.)
Attainable (and realistic) – how can the goal be reached?
Relevant – the goal matters and the timing works
Time-bound – answers “when?”; sometimes an end date, though might be first milestone where you can feel successful along the path to creating routines

First, as I’ve said before, is this a good time for you to be setting goals? Simply because this is the time of year when we’ve been taught to set resolutions, with the calendar moving into a new year, does not automatically mean this is a good time for you to be embarking on making changes. Can you ignore the social conventions of setting a goal and just say no? The R in SMART is “relevant” and sometimes that means recognizing that this is not the time for you to set any goals. The flow and events of our lives aren’t necessarily going to follow any calendar events – therefore, consider whether there is a more realistic (or “attainable”) time for you to set goals. For example:

work slows down in the summer and I won’t feel so overwhelmed
2 of the 5 big time-consuming things I’m juggling right now need to be dealt with before I will even have the time or focus to contemplate other changes
I’m more motivated in the spring with life springing up around me

Simply because the timing doesn’t work for you does not mean you are procrastinating or making excuses – really.

Second, if you know the principles of using the SMART mnemonic, do you use it? What gets in your way for working through the SMART goal steps? There are any number of reasons we might avoid working with these criteria, yet finding our own resistances can help us find our way through to making successful changes.

As we all things we do and want to change, we go through an ebb and flow, where our motivation and focus fluctuates. And it’s not always clear to us where in the process we exactly are – from being realistic to easily discouraged to highly dedicated – to the goals we have. I know that my goal from years ago of losing weight, which I share in Consider Setting Resolutions – or Not, that I wasn’t always aware of the stage I was currently in. The “goal” of losing weight was consistently there, it felt like a priority most of the time, and despite these pieces, it wasn’t enough. I’m not sure I can clearly identify what was missing early on and have the perspective now that we each simply have to find our own path.

I was certainly resistant to using the SMART mnemonic early in my goal of losing weight, so now when I see myself avoiding applying the SMART steps I take a step back and consider if there is some issue with the goal. It often becomes clear that there is a conflict between my goal and the SMART steps. Emotionally I’m trying to ignore that – after all, I really want to change this; “I don’t want to wait…”

Using the SMART criteria means that we take time to work our goal through each step. The idea of taking time for each of the SMART steps can feel daunting – after all time is a precious commodity – and who doesn’t wish “if only it were simpler…” I’ve been known to make occasional comments about wishing I had a magic wand – and how I’d share it. Yet, there’s no magic wand and the time we spend on these SMART criteria will only support us in reaching our goals. It’s also important to be focused during the process – to identify the pieces for each step of the SMART criteria and that all of them are feasible, i.e. just because a single working mom wants to get to the gym 5 days a week doesn’t mean it’s realistic for her schedule and the demands on her time.

When we use the SMART criteria, we’re claiming the intention for change clearly. The evidence of our commitment is laid out with all the steps and pieces we’ll need to be successful. Even though I feel like a broken record, I’ll say again – there is no need to feel obligated to set resolutions at this time of year or any time of year, find the timing that works for you.

Planning with Fractals in Mind – Review, Sort of

I always appreciate discovering lesser-known things – yes, always, at least when it comes to organizing, time management, productivity, and other things that fascinate me. I wish I could remember how I come across some of them, as is the case with the e-book “Clear Mind, Effective Action” by Jim Stone where he talks about his Fractal Planning system. Are you already rolling your eyes or afraid to read more? Talking about fractals and planning systems might sound intimidating or like a non sequitur, yet this is the type of thing I’ve encouraged all of you to do – at least to some degree – use what works from the systems around us and then find ways to adjust for the parts that don’t work as well.

Therefore, let’s talk about his approach, fractals and all. What do you think of when you hear the term fractals? The way he envisions fractals is as “a rough or fragmented geometric shape that can be split into parts, each of which is (at least approximately) a reduced-sized copy of the whole” which he says is how Wikipedia (at the time of writing) defines it. What is critical about fractals in his view is that they surround us and “creative productivity (like most business projects) grew via fractal processes” so a successful planning tool would incorporate fractal awareness into it.

He offers several different ways to envision fractals around us. One of those is a tree, where you take a main branch off a tree and it looks like a smaller tree. If we continue, taking a branch (he refers to this as a sub-branch) off this other (main) branch, this also looks like an even smaller tree. And so on. Sometimes there are some random variations at each step, as with this example of a tree, yet remains an example of a fractal.

$Tree as an example of a fractal we see and take for granted$

Tree as an example of a fractal we see and take for granted

Part of what that means is the versatility for breaking things down into ever and ever smaller parts – the splitting (or fracturing) mentioned above that is still a smaller representation of the bigger picture. Yet, fractal can also be seen as a way to build things up through the branching process. This can be seen with the Koch Snowflake (animated to see the process in one direction) – where you can see how both breaking down as well as building up applies.

Isn’t this what we need when we’re planning our tasks and priorities – the flexibility to approach things from any direction? Sometimes we’re stuck in the forest, unable to see the trees when we’re trying to plan. Other times all we can see are the trees – or to put it another way – we’re busy thinking in the big or small picture view and struggle with aspects that go beyond that view. Or maybe we’re just not clear – it’s somewhere between the two extremes – yet wherever we might be, it’s important to have a planning tool that will support us as we capture our thoughts. And then we can take that planning as far as we need to for maximizing our productivity and minimizing our stress – fractal like in either breaking the steps down or building our plans up.

$Von Koch Curve showing the fractal nature$

Von Koch Curve showing the fractal nature

Essentially the idea of fractal planning comes down to the idea that being aware of the fractal nature – of our plans, our goals, our entire lives – will help us as we’ll work better, becoming more efficient and effective while our stress will decrease. As Jim Stone says, “”If you set it up right, with a planning tool that allows you to break down projects to any level of detail, your plans will just grow naturally from your brain‘s innate desire to break tasks down as you go. That‘s what fractal awareness does for you. It helps you see that your whole life can be represented in the same plan, and you can trust it to grow organically, just like a tree grows (because that‘s how plans grow, too). And don‘t worry. There is no ―right way to break down your life plan or your projects and sub-projects.”

I love the optimism of this – while the skeptic in me wonders how realistic this is for everyone. Oops, even I can slip into the temptation of 1 solution for all of us. This is simply an example of one person’s solution to planning and productivity challenges that were not solved from another system out there (David Allen’s Getting Things Done are evident in places). His approach also assumes you are 1) comfortable with technology and 2) that you sit at a desk the majority of the time – where it’s easy and convenient to be interacting with your list. [Please note that I have no data on his paid online system – and am considering writing another piece that discusses some of the issues I see with this system; this post is about the ideas in his e-book.] Nevertheless, the idea of fractal awareness shifting how we view things intrigues me – without needing to adopt any other piece of his system. Are there any ideas that capture your interest?

Interpreting

What if you tried to organize a space only to realize that it wasn’t working? And you re-organize it and again find it wasn’t working? And again, repeating the steps over and over again. Would you then tell yourself that you’re not good at organizing? Have you ever thought about how you label yourself? The times that we encounter repeated struggles can be daunting and it might lead us to decide our capabilities – and not in a realistic or positive way.

Would you think me less of a professional organizer if you knew that scenario above was from my home and life? Early last month I realized that I needed to divide a category I’d created in my craft closet – that it was creating unnecessary chaos. That opened the door to how several parts were not working – there was clutter collecting again. There had been some great progress with the degree of clutter compared to the past – yet there were still problems.

I’m certainly not proud of the repeated problems I’ve had with the space. It has been extremely frustrating and amazingly overwhelming – some of which I talked about almost 2 years ago in Overwhelmed? ? – and I’m grateful that these recent changes don’t feel overwhelming, though they are frustrating sometimes! My experiences also illustrate that simply having a neat system does not magically make things organized or more importantly stay organized.

How easy it could be to decide that I’m not capable of organizing – consider that in over 10 years that I’ve played with the closet, it’s always broken down. There’s more than a decade of “evidence” that I can’t organize, isn’t there? Yet, it is focused on that closet. If you’ve read my blog for a while you know that there have been other spaces needing re-organizing – that spaces simply stop working sometimes. More signs that organizing isn’t in my skill set, right? Proof, at least if we consider only those examples.

The way we interpret our experiences can have a huge impact on what we do or don’t do. If you tell yourself that you are just no good at organizing, you’re probably going to avoid trying to do it and focus on all the “proof” that backs up your interpretation. What would happen if you searched for all the evidence that was the opposite of your interpretation (and not minimize or discount them)?

As much as the repeated failure of the organizing inside the craft room closet is hard to accept, I can also see that each time I re-do things in there I make improvements – both in how things are arranged and in how long the organization is maintained. I recognize that my continuing struggles are centered on that specific area.

It’s remarkably easy to discount our successes – it seems like we all do it in some way or context. Likewise, we all falter and struggle sometimes. It might feel that we’re more prone to challenges than other people. What do you tell yourself? Do you see any possibility for finding your way through your challenges?

I keep chipping away at that craft room closet – riding the ebb and flow of emotions – from overwhelmed, to frustrated, to excited, to apathetic, to embarrassment, to any number of other reactions. I recognize that it is simply feelings – they will pass or at least subside and don’t necessarily reflect the reality. My interpretation is that I’ve struggled to find all the solutions I need for this space and stuff at the same time – that it is evidence that there are times we need to go through the process of discovering our answers, however long that process might take. (My post, Organizing Art & Craft Supplies, talks about some solutions.)

Therefore, the way we interpret our own challenges can define how we progress through them. Professional organizers exist because people struggle with getting organized – there’s nothing wrong with facing that challenge with help. Yet, if you tell yourself that you’re just lousy with organization, what happens when the organizer leaves and you’re left to maintain the organization?

Put a limit on your critical interpretations – in what way are you challenged, specifically? How are you successful, even in the midst of that struggle? Can you see that there’s a way for you to develop the skills? When the ongoing challenges in a particular area tempt you to you give up, how will you interpret both the continuing struggle and your inclination to throw up your hands and walk away? You probably know generally what I would say – find an explanation that supports you and your strengths from the reality rather than any biases.

Giving Thanks

This is the time of year when we tend to think about being grateful – at least if you’re not already practicing gratitude regularly. After all tomorrow is Thanksgiving – a day we often associate with sharing the things we’re grateful for – before digging into the feast. Yet, it seems as a society we’re thinking more and more about gratitude – and the value gratitude has on our own lives. How often do you take time to consider what you are grateful for?

It can be all too easy to downplay and dismiss the value of expressing your gratitude – after all you’re busy and the things going right don’t require your attention, either in remembering or for problem solving. One day is enough, isn’t it, for sharing the things you’re grateful for?

Although we certainly don’t want to forget those things in life that need further attention from us, there is value in remembering all the things that went right, that there were things that we can be grateful for. Human nature is to focus on the negative, yet this just reinforces the ruts in our brain that can limit our thinking and perspective.

Earlier this year at the ICD (Institute for Challenging Disorganization) conference, one of the speakers talked to all of us about “Living Stress Free.” Lots of things can contribute to our stress level and the way they interact then has a further impact. Therefore, we can reverse the path to stress with some practice and tools. And you probably guessed it – one of those tools is expressing gratitude.

His recommendation was at the end of every week to count your blessing with these 2 steps: 1) recall 3 things from the prior week for which you are grateful and 2) acknowledge 3 things in your life (not time constrained, but overall) for which you feel blessed. He went on to share that research suggests that this practice translates into people with less depression and stress and that they are more likely to make progress on important personal goals.

New to me was that there is some evidence that counting your blessings once a week is more beneficial than doing it every day. I found contradictory information on this in my research – and overall that there is no consensus yet about the frequency. There seems to be no debate about the value of being grateful – of making a practice of it – as long as you don’t get so habituated to it. Consider the feelings that accompany being grateful – those are part of what benefits the brain.

Sometimes it can be challenging to find things that you are grateful for – whether you’re experiencing depression, a series of tough life events, or whatever else it might be that interferes with identifying the blessings in your life. Every organizing client that I’ve had has had areas where they are successful – though they don’t always recognize it. Search out the parts you are succeeding with – I insist there are some! 😉

Due to my worldview, the obstacles and struggles I’ve faced in my life are blessings – they helped me learn and grow. So even in the midst of a struggle, I can be grateful. That doesn’t mean I’m not frustrated or challenged, simply that I have confidence that it will in the long run be a blessing for my life.

Similarly, you can feel gratitude for the goals and desires you have. Where would you be without those? If you’re dealing with a cluttered living space and desire more order – can you acknowledge the strength and blessing of wanting it to change? This focuses on the positive – which will support us in moving forward.

We’ve probably all heard that “Thanksgiving was never meant to be limited to one day.” When we make a habit of gratitude we shift things for ourselves – we’re more resilient, more realistic about our self-worth (rather than pessimistic), and it helps us live mindfully in the present moment. With my approach of experimenting – if you find yourself resistant to the idea of making a practice of gratitude in your life, test it out. Commit to 2 weeks and just do it – and then observe – how do you feel? Has anything changed? In what ways?